FACT: millions of screaming preteen girls does not mean you rock
(Jonas Brothers)
picture: dunno source, via our lol builder. lol caption: jethrofloyd67
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But it does make you rich.
Corollary to aforementioned fact: Just because you’re rich does not mean you rock either.
It also gets you laid a lot … which doesn’t not mean you rock. But I’m guessing these guys are perfectly happy to sacrifice coolness for massive amounts of money and (hopefully legal) sex.
I understand that these young men are fairly strictly chaperoned by their parents.
If you haven’t heard, they wear promise rings, and are remaining virgins until they are married, so they aren’t having sex either.
Fact: wearing a promise ring does not mean you are a virgin.
Then why wear one when there’s tons of teenage girls fantasizing about you?
to get on the good side of all those parents and keep the dough comin’ like crazy.
For the same reason Brittany Spears was a “Virgin” while dating Justin Timberlake. It sells the wholesome Disney look.
Because even though alot of people hate, them they still try to be good role models. And even though i don’t like them i hold nothing but respect for that
just like miley…
But… what’s the point of having all those fans if you’re not going to use them?!
yeah, from 11 year olds.
too bad their too much of goody goodies to get some.
Attempting to look like Elvis, or looking like Michael Jackson if you don’t cut your hair doesn’t mean you rock either!!
Lefty:
Same applies to a LOT of other singers out there.
Like Kanye West.
Did you SEE how he sung live on SNL?
And I agree with David Joyner.
Rock is subjective, along with Cool.
I’m 18 and love these boys
Do you have a life?
OMG FINALLY!! i thought i was the only person on here that liked the Jonas Brothers. i was starting to feel weird about being the like ONE AND ONLY person making nice captions on pictures!!
wow ur a homo
they have always sucked…
why is his hand in his pants?
The previous statements rely on an objective definition of what it means “to rock”.
There just isn’t a definition of “to rock” that includes their stuff.
See: Angus Young
Why does that douche have such a nice guitar?
It angers me, too.
It’s because he can afford one.
AND; He can PLAY IT.
He IS really playing it.
Can you PLEASE get over the fact that they CAN play guitar?
Better than most people on here.
Besides maybe Aggiefitz.
they play guitar like ashley simpson sings live.
oh snap!
it infuriates me.
He’s not really playing it!
I hope so. Such a beautiful Les Paul only needs to be played by a real musician. I wish I had the money for that badass of a Gibson. I play a basic Ibanez
If you kill him for it the world will bawl their fcking eyes out
If you steal it he’ll go into depression and cut himself… Wait
That’s a good idea!
Fact
Being famous doesn’t mean you’re cool
He really is playing that and mabey if u guys went lazy butts you would get up,do something and get enough money to buy an awsome guitar like that
So true. Awesome guitars should be USED to play actual music, not as props…
they’re amazing. and i’m not a preteen. sorry people are mad they weren’t doing the things those boys do when they were that age, or any age for that matter.
Not quite it, but feel free to fangasm over them if you like.
It’s not necessarily a matter of “people are mad they weren’t doing the things those boys do when they were that age, or any age for that matter.” Some people just really, really, really can’t stand them because of their music.
I’m getting so tired of the whole “you guys don’t like them because you’re jealous” bit….
ya but if “they” dont like their music why don’t they just leave them alone and pay attention to their own freeking life. I dont like them but I don’t go running around saying that they suck and that they dont deserve to play music. Just listen to your own music and leave the pop fans alone
You’re so right. I mean it. I really am horribly jealous that I don’t get paid like they do for being a no talent ashhat with an obnoxious,nasal, whiny voice.
i totally agree with chichi i went to a concert of theirs and got their autographs. it was amazing
wat getting laid by men at the age of 15. gay boys
The flaw of your logic is thus:
By it(Your logic), none shall ever rock, for that is all they have. Screaming preteen girls.
Millions of screaming pre-teen girls DO not mean you rock
The word millions is the subject of that sentence and the verb should agree with it, right?
Well, not really. Millions of screaming pre-teen girls is a collective group, not so much a plural noun. It’s hard for me to describe in grammar terms, but “Millions of screaming pre-teen girls DO not like you” would be correct, but it’s not used in the context, exactly. So it would be “does”.
agreed.
Let me teach you retards about implied words.
The sentence is, which the implied words in brackets “[Having] millions of screaming preteen girls [as fans] does not mean [that] you rock.” They are not saying “millions of screaming preteen girls do not mean that you rock,” because that is illogical; millions of screaming preteen girls means nothing… they’re people; they don’t have a meaning. It’s obvious that other words are implied, now quit trying to be intelligent; you failed.
Yeesh, are you enough of an ass today? They did not correct the grammar in a rude or derogatory way. The only one to get rude and fly off the handle so far is you. Calm down, people deserve a little more respect than what you are displaying. You can be a rude little douchenozzle somewhere else.
Ok I am using douchenozzle on someone the next time they tick me off.
it is also a good description of any given Jonas brother.
“they’re people; they don’t have a meaning.”
I BELIEVE I HAVE A MEANING IN LIFE .
OK .
Wow… first you throw the word “retard” around and accuse the person of not being intelligen– wait, what person are you accusing? I can’t tell because you firstly did NOT manage to reply to anyone (apparently reasonably intelligent people can’t understand the meaning of “Reply to this comment”?).
Following that, your corrections, I will admit, are accurate.
But then you fail at using grammar yourself, and even at getting your point across. Philosophy has nothing to do with grammar or implied words.
You’ve made an utter fool of yourself to anyone with a brain.
Philosophy? It’s common sense. People don’t have meaning. Also, maybe the reason I didn’t reply to a single person’s comment is because it was directed at two different people? Notice how I said “retards” and not “retard”. Learn how to read before you critique my grammar… or at least supply evidence of my misuse of grammar.
Kthx bee.
(you) probably had your (|) < ass kicked [alot] in high school (Right?)
No, but that made me LMAO. I had that one coming.
a-effin’-men.
Amen to that
Hmmmmm, guess no one’s ever heard of the Beatles. They had MILLIONS of screaming pre-teens, teens, and adults. They got filthy rich, and they rock. Of course, I’m not saying that they are the Beatles.
The implication does not go both ways. The statement does not imply that if you have millions of screaming preteens then you do not rock. The statement says that having millions of screaming preeteens does not necessarily mean that you rock.
Exactly! You win!
Oh thank you! *goes to collect prize*
however the jonas brothers fans are 95% preteen girls. the beatles actually had some mature fans.
Plus, the Beatles’ music has stood the test of time. It still rocks today. The Jonas Brothers music will not be relevant in five or ten years. Once they stop having the Disney marketing machine behind them, they will cease to matter.
Hopefully, if we are lucky, it will not be relevant next month.
It’s not even relevant now.
putting the jonas-brothers in the same sentence as the beatles is blaspemy right?
No. Not as long as that sentence contains some the fact that they are NOT the Beatles. And as you can see, Missy did say that they were not, so we won’t stone her today. *puts down handful of rocks*
Thanks for not stoning me today. I must say, though, I have a 13 yr old. She likes the J.B. Not obsessive or anything… not crazed at all as a matter of fact. I’ve heard a song or two of theirs, I don’t think they are that bad…I think I even like that song Love Bug.
Please don’t stone me for that……please!!
I think it’s fine to like one or two of their songs, but what I really hate are all the little girls who think the Jonas Brothers are just the greatest musicians ever. I have heard people, in all seriousness, call them “the Beatles of this generation” or some nonsense like that, and to me that’s when their fans are really annoying.
But they rock.
They rock on.
*shoots self*
Don’t ask me how I can quote that. I don’t want to relive it.
Happy Panda?
I lol’d
Fact:
A couple of lowlife losers that express their dislike for you on an internet blog does not mean you suck.
But the fact that it’s significantly more than “a couple” might be a sign that you do.
wow. definitely a win…
Ah, so I see you did not catch the fact that that statement was intended to belittle you. By saying “a couple” it makes you all seem insignificant.
FACT: Trying to seem witty by explaining how your comment belittled
people is stupid when nobody really cares.
But not as insignificant as you…
Fact: Having no actual talent means you suck
eww those sideburns/muttonchops
*barfs*
Heh. You said “muttonchops”.
Good show, man!
lol.
Hey Kevin,
the 70′s called.
they want their sideburns back
oops, didn’t mean it to change that. i meant the stick tongue thing…
Amen to that caption, despite the grammar flaws.
YOU DOUCHES SHUT UP ABOUT GRAMMAR AND HEAD OVER TO LOLCAT ALREADY!
Let me put it in “perfect” English if you people can’t get over it.
Just because you have millions of preteen girls screaming over you, it does not necessarily mean you rock.
ha ha.Finally!Its just a website not an exam lol
I went to my cousin’s house for a few days (that’s DAYS not weeks) and I was made to suffer the awfulness of Camp Rock. About five times. I hate anything related to the J**** B******* now.
I love how you put the asterisks there as if their name were a swear word.
well have any of those screaming girls flung a training bra onstage? then no, they are not real rockstars.
I’m a non-crazy preteen girl, surrounded by crazy preteen girls. I just don’t get the appeal of these guys. I can sing just like them. Scratch that, they sing like me.
dont be so hard on yourself!
I am a non-crazy preteen girl surrounded by crazy preteen girls. I swear, IF ONE MORE EFFING PERSON SAYS THE JONAS BROTHERS ROCK I WILL BUY A KNIFE. AND STAB THEM UNTIL THEY TURN RED. VERY RED. AND THE FLOOR TOO. Okay, caps off now.
The Jonas Brothers… Sock?
that’s supposed to be spelled with a U
I didn’t want Darth-Tobi dulling his knife by stabbing the floor waiting for it to turn red.
Ehm.. *her* knife.
God you freeking loser get a life!!!!!!!!!! Dont you have anything better to do then make fun of a Disney pop band? Dude get a hobby, see a therapist SOMETHING!!!!!!!!!!! Btw THEY ROCK!
btw even if someone flings a training bra onstage, they will still not be real rockstars, for disneys standards dont go anywhere near that high. plus, whoever threw it would probably be arrested. I bet the Jonas Brothers hide it, frame it, then fight over who gets to tack it up in their room.
Looking at you, Stephanie Meyer.
JK, JK.
Not really.
Win, right there. You deserve a cookie.
Hurray, I was half-expecting to be attacked by a bunch of Twi-tards. They must all be in line at the movie theaters now.
What’s wrong with Twilight?Its a young adults book(so it says) definitely not for
the faint hearted preteens.
I like the Jonas Brothers. However, I know that I can’t change y’all’s opinions and y’all sure as hell won’t change mine, but have any of y’all had millions of pre-teen or teenage girls screaming for you? No? Okay then. No one can top the Beatles, but I honestly don’t think anyone ever will.
I think “to rock” is a subjective term. What rocks to one person will suck to another. I personally think they aren’t that great, but they rock to a lot of people (even if they are all girls from the age of 10~17). And besides, they have fooled millions into giving them their money, and for that, I salute them .
Sad.. But very true. Being that the fans are predominantly preteen girls.. Oh noes! That means they didn’t earn the money themselves it was purchased by their parents! This is an economical disaster.
Still, anyone who can con so many people out of so much money with so very little talent.. Suck or not they have something. Maybe they put some kind of aerosol hallucinogen in their CDs. Or maybe it’s like Zeppelin.. you know has hidden messages and stuff. @@
I believe its the tightness of the pants that makes the Jo Bros rock. I haven’t seen jeans that tight since Brooke Shields rocked her Jordache. Jeez I’m old..
jonas brothers sound constipated when they sing!
“HOOLD ONNNN HOOOLD ON!!!!”
ok you do that JB! dont explode jeez! but u sure u wanna “hold on”
Can we all agree that it’s extremely douche-y to wear neckties/cravats/neckerchiefs/ascots underneath your popped-collar shirts?
I can agree to that one. Anyone that disagrees is probably a douche who wears neckties/cravats/neckerchiefs/ascots underneath popped-collar shirts.
Why stop at an AK-47? Why not use an Ur-Matter Bomb?
And by the way, I don’t care what kind kind of Aisan you insult, as long as they’re not Japanese.
You r a freeking loser. Dont you have something better to do then make fun of a frickn’ disney pop band? GET A HOBBY! GET A GIRLFRIEND (or a boyfriend) DO SOMETHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Were you voted most likley to in a mental institution in high school? GO PICK ON SOMEONE WITH THE SAME AMONT OF YOUR TALENT! Wait that would be a speck of dust… sorry.
lol the wiggles name makes me laugh
NO KILL DA KITTEHS PLZ. KTHX
They want to be ZO2 when they grow up.
The ultimate proof that the Jonas Brothers will not last long in the music industry..
I have proof that the Jonas Brothers will not last long in the music industry…
Just look at Hanson…
Who?
Exactly!
Yesterday, I colmpletely lost all respect for the Jonas Brothers when I discovered that they’ve done a cover of one of my favourite songs ever. And they MURDERED it.
Personally I am offended by the existence of the Jonas Brothers, because they are a statement that talent is not considered for music anymore.
I am a musician, but I will never make it that big, because a great corporation will not back me. My playing style doesn’t appeal to mindless preteen girls, it has something called “music” in it.
ANd for the record, out of morbid curiosity, i learned how to play a jonas Brothers song, :Burnin Up”(stupid song by the way, generic uninspired lyrics) and i learned it in about 5 seconds. It is that simple
What song was it?
Year 3000 by Busted. I could not stop singing this when I was 10.
I had hair like that in high school and it was a major turn-off for girls… how do five years change the game so much?
Disney told them to like it
They found out how many girls want me then the singer decided to try to be a decent singer like me and have long black hair like mine
I bet he’s a “settle everything through words” person too
From what I’ve read the Jonas Brothers are perfectly nice young men, but I agree that they aren’t really very much as musicians.
Our screaming isn’t was classifies them as amazing, but they still are!!! …screaming fans are pretty cool, though!!! I LOVE JB!!!
Based on what? We evaluated their lack of talent based on a poor singing voice, very generic and lame lyrics, and simplistic guitar riffs, combined with lots of effects and a mass marketing machine designed to fool idiots like you.
Your reason for them being good? “OmG THEEY are soOOOOoOO AMZING!”
everyone has different tastes in music just because you don’t like them doesn’t mean that the people who do are wrong.
Ha, yes it does.
aha! u win the great debate!
aha!no,eatyourface doesnt.Jonas brothers rule had a great point.
I think this website just lost a lot of visitors with this capture.
Including me.
preteen girls will scream at unicorns. unicorns… jonas brothers… not great achievement on their part.
I’d scream if I saw a Unicorn(Cause the chances of that happening are none).And then sell it for tons of money! rofl
i love the jonas brothers and everybody else who hates them…GO TO HELL!!!!!
*cracks up* youll learn someday.
i hope!!!!! jonas brothers sing like theyre constipated, and their ‘bogus jonas’ of a brother acts like hes the best person in the world.
Hell is probably betta cuz it doesnt have the jonas brothers in it. (YET) then again theyre ALL the bogus jonas.
i love the Jonas Brothers…and anyone else who hates them..GO TO HELL!!!!!!!!!
Why don’t you since you believe in it c-nt
Looks like a certain fangirl’s getting a bit cranky…
Why? She’s probably too young to have a period…
BOGUS JONAS BOGUS JONAS!!!
Actually,it does,idiot.Just because u can’t get a girl…
And do u realize how many girls would attack and beat you for this?
yeah….jonas brothers suck…..i have nothing to add except that someone should stab them with sweeny todd’s knife. not me, im too young to go to jail.
try a band like paramour, funeral for a friend, hawthorne heights, or some bands that are actually good
OK all you “Haters” Dont you have a life? Nothing better to do then pick on some DISNEY POP BAND???????? GET A HOBBY. KISS A GIRL/BOY. DO SOMETHING!! Were all you guys voted “most likley to go to a mental institution”???????? Get on with your frickin’ life and leave the Jonas Brothers ALONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
dontcha mean ‘Disney Poop Band” id much rather go to a mental instutution. theres no jonas brothers there.
its disney pop band,and i hope u do go to a mi cause at least there u cant get a laptop where u can talk bout them
FACT: hating on someone does NOT make u retards cool, or funny, SO GIVE IT UP!
ps: they rock, and ur just jealous of them cuz u can’t play music like that!
they cnt play music they sound like screeching cats. slipknot is a awsome band.
slipknot, FTW
the jonas brothers need to go die in a hole
I can sing better than any given JoBro, and I am FRICKIN’ SICK OF HEARING “You’re just jealous”.
P.S. You’re hating on us. By your own logic, you’re not cool or funny.
and since your hating right there,u are not cool or funny
Listen you jerk, nobody is a retard! I can play the guitar as good or maybe even better then any of them. I have been playing the guitar since I was 6 and I am older then Kevin by a few years! TAKE THAT!!!! HAHAHAHA! Want me to go on?
FACT: You can’t attack someone who hates JB just because you love them! You have fingers. Use them to complain about someone else’s opinion, would ya?!?!?!?!?!?!
I am talking about Haley!
omg ur soooo right! i cant even play the guitar and im better than them.
Why would anyone even want to play music like that? It’s crappy as in the message it sends and it’s a crappy music line aswell.
and Kawaii me, shes means Disney pop band, ans why don’t u go screw urself in a mental instutution! have a nice day (F*****)
okay… okay, okay, okay, okay. Calm down there D: No need to start a fight over this crap, kay? You like the JoBros. Okay. Some of us don’t. Okay. NONE of us should even be fighting over this scheiße >.> It’s all just so stupid. Fighting is stupid.
I get that you love the JB, but you gotta face it… you can’t make everybody love them. It’s just not possible. Just like I can’t make everybody love Tokio Hotel T_T it’s just not possible. I’ve seen all the insults, and I’m tired of it. There’s no point in fighting a battle that you just can’t win. So you might as well stop.
To FishieLPKaulitz8…
Word…
*chuckles* hahahaha……..disney pretty much means “Poop band”
xD lol lol lol lol… you know D: I used to like these guys… T_T then they got sucky and crappy. And a lot of the fans that I know just LOVE to fight T_T especially when it comes to the newest band, Tokio Hotel. They’re just mad that those guys are better than their precious JoBros xD lol Though… I will say that Tokio Hotel isn’t for everybody =P but anyway… xD I agree with this one! lol true, true, true…
I hate them but that doesnt mean I have to throw mindless instults at them! But BTW I love Tokio Hotel!!!!!
You apparently think that you have to throw mindless insults at us (see any other of cheezburger’s comments.)
I hope I got the previous sentence right. Grammar police, do not descend upon me! *please??*
I was about to say that…
It has to be great to call yourself a retard
You’re asking for trouble! millions of people LOVE the jonas bros!
Millions of 10-year-olds, maybe…
Hayley! OH MY GOD. It is not a problem if someone has a different opinion then you. I do not like the Jonas Brothers at all but that does not mean I am a hater… Just if somebody hates the Jonas Brothers does NOT ( that is NOT. N-O-T, NOT!!! ) mean they are jealous, it is just their F***ING opinion. So, what I am saying is that what people think is not controlled by someone’s fat head!!! Oh yea, I went there. XD
YAY MCR YAY MCR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And nobody cares… LOL! : P
why is his hand in his pants??
my mom laughed so hard at this!
Self Destruction Prediction outlines:
Jonas Brothers: 2 and a half years
Miley Cyrus: 2 Years
I hate these guys. I bet you anything they wear those promise rings because they are gay. SERIOUSLY?! do they NOT look gay to you in that picture?!
Sorry, but that’s just my opinion
Here here!
Thats so true
whats the words to katy perrys song?
you’re so gay and you don’t even like boys… haha
i’m a preteen and i think they’re talentless girls
agreed
rock is now truly dead..this makes me want to cry
its just bubble gum pop, its not ment to last too too long.
honestly, they arn’t tinting the definition of rock because they arn’t. any parent or smart teenager will tell you it has already been set in stone.
im 13 and i think they suck. any girl my age that obsesses over them needs to get a life and to be introduced to GREEN DAY
wow this stuff is hilarious, lulz gold. btw, i personally do not like the jonas brothers or hanna montana, they are just disneys way of trying to reproduce the sucess of high school musical (first was okay). when they relised their are only 4 years of high school they panicked. only then they relised what the chilrend wanted. poor quality pop music.
Disney is not the awsome company it used to be, and some nights i think i can hear Walt Disney’s frozen head scream in agony over what his company became.
I agree. All of these “musicians” who can’t actually sing or play their instruments are ruining Disney’s good name.
if Walt were still alive I think he’d kill himself
poor him. what happened to Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck and all that nice fun cute kid stuff?
So true…
where haz music gone these days
THANK YOU!
really?
it just means your rich.
yeah we get it
amy whinehouse is a trainwreck
the jonas brothers suck
twilight is stupid
marilyn monroe is classy
NOW CAN WE PLEASE COME UP WITH SOMETHING ORIGINAL!
Fact: You can hate someone without being jealous
Fact: You can like someone without obsessing over them
Those are the facts.
btw the jonas bros have no talent and the fans that get all obsessed need a life. I accept that there are fans that simply like them, but I hate the ones who really obsess over them.
posers.
Haha, at all the bitter losers posting hate on here. *pointing* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
preteen girls are obsessed with any hollywood douchebag with a penid
is that MJ to the left?!?!?
Their music is terrble, but maybe they wouldnt be so bad if millions of preteen fangirls werent so obssed with them. lol i’m twelve and i hate them so much that i wince at the sound of their name, so if you think that all preteens are rabid about twilight (although i do enjoy the books, hate the movies though) miley cyrus, jonas bros etc etc, your wrong.
people like these sort of singers because they are easy to sing along with because they have basic notes and repetitive lyrics. i (unfortunately) could probably sing the chorus of a few jo-ho-fro-homo-bro songs.
just cuz ya criticize oderz dosnt mean u rok either