How about you tell that blonde joke to my face.
(Orlando Bloom)
Picture by: dunno source. Caption by: wedontsparkle via Advanced Lol Builder
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What do you call a smart blonde?
…
A golden retriever!
You stole that from Twilight. Breaking dawn, Book 2(Jacob) Chapter 15
And Stephanie Mayer stole it from “The Big Book of Blonde Jokes”, (c) Clive James 1960.
I know.
How do you drown a blonde?
put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool
LOL
Wow. A true Twilight fangirl, aren’t we? Never concluded that a blonde joke featured in one of Meyer’s trainwreck books could have had another origin? Stephenie Meyer invented vampires and the word “chagrin”, didn’t she? :eyeroll:
Amen. Finally, someone with brains AND a sense of humor… hard to come by, these days.
A sense of humor? not so much.
Stephanie myers wrote some good books in her time…
BUT TWILIGHT WAS A FAIL. EPIC FAIL.
seriously though, the only people that bother bashing twilight are the ones that A) like being mean to people, B) attempt to be ‘cutting edge,’ ‘not fitting in’ but totally are, or C) because all the rest of their friends bash twilight so they do it too. You’re not the first to say that either.
Sorry, it just annoys me.
Why can’t Edward read Bella’s Mind? Cause there was nothing there to read.
Fangirls are the worst part of twilight. They’re usually not all that bright, fanatic about the books and they’ll lock you in a closet if you say twilight “was Okay”
“Yay twilight! it’s the best book I’ve ever read!”
“It’s the ONLY book you’ve ever read.”
Second !
Pterosaurs (pronounced /ˈtɛrəˌsɔr/, from the Greek πτερόσαυρος, pterosauros, meaning “winged lizard”, often referred to as pterodactyls, from the Greek πτεροδάκτυλος, pterodaktulos, meaning “winged finger” /ˌtɛrəˈdæktɨl/) were flying reptiles of the clade or order Pterosauria. They existed from the late Triassic to the end of the Cretaceous Period (220 to 65.5 million years ago). Pterosaurs are the earliest vertebrates known to have evolved powered flight. Their wings were formed by a membrane of skin, muscle, and other tissues stretching from the legs to a dramatically lengthened fourth finger. Early species had long, fully-toothed jaws and long tails, while later forms had a highly reduced tail, and some lacked teeth. Pterosaurs spanned a wide range of adult sizes, from the very small Nemicolopterus to the largest known flying creatures of all time, including Quetzalcoatlus and Hatzegopteryx.[1][2][3]
Pterosaurs are sometimes referred to in the popular media as dinosaurs, but this is incorrect. The term “dinosaur” is properly restricted to a certain group of terrestrial reptiles with a unique upright stance (superorder Dinosauria), and therefore excludes the pterosaurs, as well as the various groups of extinct aquatic reptiles, such as ichthyosaurs, plesiosaurs, and mosasaurs.
Yay for random, useless facts!
^_^
>.> Yarrrrrr!!! *Pillages*
It’s the only suitable reply to random, useless comments.
I would if I couldn’t stop laughing at you
Are “girly” jokes okay?
I don’t get it!!!!! Please explain!!!!! He has a bow an arrow. Or is it implying he IS dumb because he has a bow and arrow????
Well, he’s blonde. He has a bow and arrow. So, it is implying that if someone make a blonde joke on him, he shoots the jokester.
Hope I could be of assistance.
Huh?? “to my face” implies you are dared to approach the elf directly and insult him. However, a bow and arrow is a ranged weapon and clearly is not the proper choice to defeat a jokester insulting you to your face. For this threat to be effective you must use a melee weapon such as a sword, staff, nun chucks, pocket knife, pee, tazer, or a booger which are all way more threatening at close range. You would want to avoid; bows, crossbows, bazookas, rocket launchers, catapults, rifles, and or aerial bombardments. Perhaps if the caption read “How about you tell that blonde joke while standing still 20 yards over there facing the sun,” then I could understand the bow and arrow choice.
OH FOR CRYING OUT LOUD! Stop being so bloody picky! If you don’t like it, shut your mouth and chuff off!
For the average blond joke teller, the pocket knife (dull, one inch), pee, or booger would be more than effective – unsporting, actually.
wooooow i forget asspies play on the internet too..
unless of course he intended to leave you pinned to the ground,,,,
And by the time you finished saying that, there’s an arrow through your skull.
Jeez, you saw him in the movie right? (*stab, take out arrow, shoot with arrow, whirl, shoot more)
How about I paraphrase LOTR (book) at you. At the end of the battle of Helm’s Deep, Legolas and Gimli are discussing what their respective kill counts are:-
Gimli – “I have killed 40 Orcs today”.
Legolas – “I have killed 41; it has been knife-work down here”.
Still want to argue about him holding a ranged weapon?
He does have GREAT hair.
Not a real blonde though, so it loses a bit of its punch.
Sigourney Weaver on Galaxy Quest – “I wore a blonde wig (for the film), and didn’t say a single intelligent thing for 8 months”.
Win.
*claps*
Live long and prosper, Galaxy quest.
i’d do it legolas isnt really that scary
You asked for it Elf boy
Q – Why did the blonde have bruises round her belly button?
A – Because blond men aren’t too clever either
thankyouplease
LOL’d.
i dont care, hes still hot lol
:3 I would.
Epic
no blonde jokes? how about can’t act jokes?
For instance: “Orlando, how does it feel to be out-acted by a monkey?”
What’s the difference between a blonde and a solar powered calculator? The blonde works in the dark!
How do you make a blonde’s eyes twinkle? Shine a flashlight in their ear.
Why did the blonde tip-toe past the medicine cabinet? So she wouldn’t wake up the sleeping pills.
How do you confuse a blonde? Ask her to alphabetize a bag of M&Ms.
Why does it work? “Does 3 come before E or does it go between M and W?”
You asked for it, you pointy eared, green blooded, emotionless son of a…. Oops, that’s Star Trek. Haha.
LOL
this actor is not as popular as he used to be.
oh Legolas you bad-ass. Superhearing, barely any weight so you don’t leave footprints, and kick-ass archery skills. Being blonde can only take a tiny 0.06% of his awesomeness!
huh…
if you tell it to his face, you’re too close for him too fire that arrow