oh won’t you plz halp me 2 find bukkit
(Mariah Carey)
We’ll send out a search party. (Via I Can Has Cheezburger)
Picture by: dunno source Caption by: dunno source via Our LOL Builder
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What a pale lolrus
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oh snap. served
You rule!
this is by far the best caption I have ever seen!!!!
she looks like a fat monkey
She’s not fat just a bit floppy. Needs some “stoppen-ze-floppers”.
Really? A walrus or a fat monkey? I’m no Mariah fan, but seems to me she looks healthy and pretty. Not stick skinny, but just fine, except she doesn’t look like that position is very comfortable.
Yes, but this is an INCREDIBLY unflattering photo of her. Normally she doesn’t look like a walrus. Here, she does.
It is unflattering. But she doesn’t look “fat”, whatever that even means anymore. She looks like anyone looks when they’re scrunched down like that.
Yes, she does. On this particular unflattering photo she looks fat. That’s why the photo is unflattering.
Normally she’s just chubby.
Anyway, it’s a shame, because not so long ago she lost some weight and indeed did look very good (even though I’m not really a fan of her singing, nor of her looks). Pitty it didn’t last.
Oh fer crying out loud. Mariah Carey is NOT chubby! The whole world suddenly has body dismorphic disorder at everyone, especially women, extra especially women celebrities! A woman gains a few pounds in twenty years, simply because she’s not as young as she used to be, and suddenly she’s “chubby”! Get a sense of perspective!
You’re putting way too much thought into this.
Most of the people at the LOL sites are teenage boys that have never SEEN a woman within their own physical proximity. Of COURSE Mariah Carey looks fat to them – they’ve never seen a female that wasn’t posing and airbrushed.
Or drawn in a comic book.
Probably true, but that’s no excuse. They should still be corrected in their warped thinking.
Besides, most of them must at least have mothers.
Yeah…because Mariah Carey is NEVER airbrushed at all…that’s just the thin celebrities, right?
That isn’t the point. It’s A point, but not this point. I’m equally sick of all the ways that the music/movie/fashion industries go out of their way to make people feel ugly and inadequate if they don’t conform to certain impossible beauty standards. Airbrushing and digital alteration is a major culprit, including the fact that models and celebrities are altered to look thinner than they are, and their skin smoothed to the point that it doesn’t look like human skin. Apparently really beautiful people aren’t even allowed to have pores, let alone natural lines in their faces.
You could also not listen to or read or watch things that offend you. There’s always that. People like skinny. You’re not going to change it. Get over it. And besides, this caption is funny for a few reasons. The pose is unflattering. The bathing suit gives her a lolrus look. Her pose also resembles a lolrus arching its back, supporting itself with its flippers.
hey, aren’t you up past your bedtime?
I just wish people would stop telling her she can sing. Please don’t tell me that millions of fans can’t be wrong, because that excuse doesn’t work for Twilight, the Jonas brothers, American Idol, ect.
People are just idiots. Thank you for your time.
Considering all those you listed are rolling in money and fame, it does work.
fame and money =/= quality.
that should be a given.
i’m not saying that people can’t be both successful and talented, i’m just saying that one does not assure the other.
sadly
I beg to differ. She most assuredly can sing. Her mother was an opera singer and began training her at the age of three. She can sing over five octaves with amazing power.
I personally think she has sold herself out and I can’t stand her pop style, but her genius for music is unquestionable.
ps – She looks like she needs a little more support and coverage than she’s getting, and I don’t just mean in the seating area.
She CAN sing, she just chooses not to any more. And hasn’t since Charmbracelet. I hate her new stuff, she’s all whispery now.
Except she can sing. I can’t stand her style but at one point in her career she could sing quite well. I have no idea why she does the breathy trash she does now (well, I have an idea but I can’t prove it) but, when she was younger she could singer better than almost anyone else out there.
sing better*
I’m sorry, it’s too cold and my mind just isn’t functioning correctly.
Oh man, I LOLed like I’ve never LOLed before… I think.
I also LOLed. Coincidence? I think not!
Looks like a beached ‘wail’ to me.
OICWYDT
I don’t understand that caption? Is ‘won’t you please help me to find bucket’ a saying or something? Can someone explain?
Find the lolrus
he’s looking for his bukkit 
Google lolrus
It’s just more stupidly misspelled “LOLZ” nonsense, which people somehow still find funny even though they were NEVER funny in the first place.
OHNOEZ!!! Mariah haz steelded teh LOLrus’s bukket!!
And yet here you are perusing said nonsense..day in day out just looking for a reason to partake in grumpy discourse.
Meh to you, get a kitteh, a itteh, bitteh one and learn to laugh.
Good grief, don’t get a cat if you don’t have a sense of humour already. Kittens are adorable until they weigh more than an ounce and start knocking stuff over and breaking everything you own because they’re curious about whether or not they can move something, and hey, doesn’t the human come running when it hears a smashysmashy sound? So much fun! I am currently down to two everyday dinner plates because of my latest feline addition (who is just nine months old now). Non-cat-people would have gotten rid of her long ago. Cat people just grin and bear it and buy Royal Chinet for a while.
Or you could just not store your dinner plates where your cat can reach. I’ve had three cats and they didn’t break much, if anything that I can think of… Stuff got knocked off the coffee table, my computer got sat on, the couch got scratched. But seriously, how the hell did your cats break your dinner plates?
I peruse for funny captions (so obviously I know how to laugh- nice try though!
), but that misspelled “kitteh” crap was never funny. Ever.
I always found it cute, when done right. Sometimes they go overboard.
Somebody doesn’t understand that the internets are controlled by minors.
And minors who’d be at a disadvantage in a battle of wits with a house plant at that….
Coming from someone who can’t be witty in their first language, this is hilarious; criticising people who can be funny in a second language!
Couldn’t agree more, jasonx. About as funny as a red-hot poker up the arse.
Last thing she needs is bukkit of chicken
and yes I know about the blue bukkit
free mah bucket or i’ll free your willy!
That’s not much of a threat. Who doesn’t want his willy freed?
I agree with jasonx! Not even remotely funny.
Thank you! Yes, not funny, just stupid. And not in a funny way.
You seriously can’t look at the lolrus picture, and imagine him crying with that ridiculous face, talking in a voice something like Chewbacca’s, saying “THEY TOOK MAH BUKKIT!?” It is more than one level of funny. Guess you’re just old.
Fat.
And funny!
Not that fat, really. Or that funny, really. FAIL.
LOL – I actually did laugh out loud. Probably one of the best I’ve read in a long time.
that is an unfortunate angle/pose for her…yikes
wow, she has really let herself go.
Oh? So every woman should be a size 0 with huge breasts? You think that’s normal or attractive?
I can’t even begin to enumerate the ways in which this is a repugnantly hateful statement.
U r fat coment0r lol
LOL this is probably my favorite
(i also don’t think mariah is fat or that she can’t sing, but this is a horrrrrrrrrid picture and hilarious)
LEAVE MARIAH ALONE!!!!!!
If you’re being sarcastic, awesome. I lol’d.
If you’re being serious, oh god.
dont bash M she in my opinion looks the best she has ever beauty isnet decribed by a pant size people and i bet half of you people are bigger than her so dont be a bunch of selritious pricks!
Wow all of you that think she’s fat – WTF are you ON? She’s healthy and pretty. Which is a LOT more than can be said for twigs like the Olsens, Paris and all those other Celibritards. How would you like it if your sister, friend, daughter thought, thanks to insidious misogynistic bull like that, that she needed to starve herself, almost or possibly kill herself downing pills, starving and working out, all to fit some hyped, over the top and biologically impossible standard of “beauty”?
nah sry she’s kinda fat.
She looks fat to me, but she mostly does. It’s always a big deal when she gets thin again and goes on Oprah to talk about it. The big question is what’s wrong with being fat? I mean you can admit that people are fat, when they are without there being a judgement attached to that. I prefer to be thin myself but that by itself doesn’t say anything about my values.
very funny. ha ha
Holy crap this is retarded. Gotta be one of the worst captions I’ve ever seen here. Its like as bad as those horrible loldogs/cats sites…
Yeah, they’re way past stupid. In fact, you’d need to turn around and use binoculars just to catch a glimpse of stupid.
Meh thinx u 2 ketched sum uv teh stoopd wen it went bai u
I actually started laughing so hard, I wound up whining….. :’D Oh.. kudos.
Unflattering angle, but in a day and age where we have partners going on “The Biggest Loser” who have a combined weight within a hundred pounds of my *horse’s*, where they’re having to buy special exercise equipment because normal treadmills and bikes can’t accommodate them, is a woman who doesn’t have a concave stomach and has cellulite (which isn’t even related to fitness) really fat? And I don’t own a mini. I own a 16hh thoroughbred who weighs about a thousand pounds.
Mariah’s not a stick figure. The pose is not flattering. But she is hardly fat because she’s not built like a prepubescent girl with breast implants. At most she might what’s average now.
I agree.
You haters are totally hot I’m sure… suck it, she’s fly.
Her head looks like it was shrunken in photoshop a bit…
there’s mah lolrus!
thats just a unflattering photo of her, evry1 has them!! i bet the person he captioned it has one even worse than that. would you rather it was Jocelyn Wildenstein or miley cyrus?!
She is pretty