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Strange man. Living alone. Reclusive. Dresses weirdly. Offering candy to kids.
These days the police would be knocking down his door
(Gene Wilder)
I think I’ll pass on the candy.
Picture by: dunno source Caption by: Feel-Good via Advanced Lol Builder
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LMAO this is sooo true.
Why? They left Michael Jackson alone…
exactly!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
… because Michael Jackson never did anything illegal. If he had, he would be rotting in a country club prison right now.
Well, exept for being DEAD right now.
Hence the rotting.
You overestimate the justice system and underestimate the power of being rich and famous. I mean, OJ got away with murder, for heaven’s sake.
Reply fail.
And, no, MJ was never *convicted* of doing anything illegal.
Yes, because not being convicted is the be all end all test of innocence. *sarcasm*
But Gene Wilder is excellent. The Producers, Young Frankenstein, Blazing Saddles, Silver Streak, you name it. I felt so sorry when he lost Gilda.
You. Get. NOTHING! You LOSE! Good DAY sir!
you my friend, despite your disturbing name, are awesome.
Mr. Wonka, I’m Detective Stabler. This is Detective Benson. We’d like to ask you a few questions.
Dammit! Now I have to dry off my computer screen.
I love you! lol
It worked for Howard Hughes.
Now its time for the Bob Ross facts.
Bob Ross once painted the grand canyon that was so detailed someone went to touch it, fell in, and was never seen again
Bob Ross invented the tree
The emotion happy was never known until Bob Ross was born
Bob Ross has a pacemaker, otherwise his heart would go out from being too relaxed.
Bob Ross Is the only person to draw a portrait of Chuck Norris and live to tell the tale.
Bob Ross applied for a patent for the constitution of his white afro. The people of Latvia currently use his afro design as a cheap alternative to airbags.
Makers of the drug Valium suggest against combining this drug with a Bob Ross marathon, as it has been known to cause people to slip into comas.
In Armenia, the preferred method of anesthetics, is to show a patient half an hour of “Joy of Painting”. Two minutes are usually enough, doctors show the other 28 just to be sure the patient is under.
Bob Ross’ fro was once a home for orphaned bald eagles.
Bob Ross inspired a Tree hugger to find these infamous happy little trees and he was never seen again. some say he lives with the happy little trees others say the evil trees found him first…
Emos weren’t around until Bob Ross passed away.
Bob Ross never did autographs. He gave away paintings that he made right on the spot, within the same amount of time a regular painter takes to ready his easel.
If Bob Ross got angry, the world would explode. Luckily for us, Bob Ross was incapable of having any emotions similar to anger.
Bob Ross never weighed in on the Ninja vs. Pirate issue.
He once painted a life sized Red Wood forest.
Bob Ross used his afro to house a family of happy little squirrels.
Which were promptly eaten by the eagles.
Bob Ross once painted a picture of Cancun’s Lagoons using a toothbrush and a tube of toothpaste.
Bob Ross once at a tree. It died and Bob bob became depressed, so he then dedicated his life work to making little happy trees to help overcome that trauma.
Bob Ross painted a hole to a dimension where Mr. T and Chuck Norris were being beaten on by Ben Affleck and Matt Damon.
Bob Ross’ soul still lives on, inside a painting in his mansion.
Bob Ross actually painted the Mona Lisa, but since he was so awesome, he gave Leo credit.
When Bob Ross talks about god, he’s actually referring himself in third person.
Bob Ross’s face is so awesome, that it makes camera’s explode. So when you see Bob Ross, he’s actually behind a canvas painting/animating himself from behind it.
Bob Ross puts laughter into man-slaughter.
Bob Ross did not master art, he invented it.
Bob Ross didn’t die, he fell asleep.
The state of Minnesota is actually a Bob Ross painting.
Bob Ross found yoga to be too stressful
Bob Ross invented bulletproof glass by doing a head spin in a sandbox. Pretty similar to the way he invented marble.
Bob Ross once traveled through time and taught early man how to paint.
Then he taught Jesus how to be relaxed.
Bob Ross once defused a bomb using only his hair.
Bob Ross is actually Jesus. The beard is a dead giveaway.
Woodstock originally started as a NRA meeting until Bob Ross walked by it.
Bob Ross doesn’t paint and erase; he creates and uncreates.
Scientists have proven through years of evidence that the Big Bang was just Bob Ross accidentally bumping some of his paint cans over.
Bob Ross can paint in 4D.
Bob Ross didn’t pass away. Instead he just transcended the physical world into a state of pure enlightenment. Oddly enough, this state happens to be one of his paintings.
Trees were actually created by nature to mimic Bob Ross’s head and afro.
When Christians need help, they pray to God. When God needs help, he prays to Bob Ross.
Bob Ross’s “pleasantness” is directly related to his afro size. Not knowing this, a fan tried to shave it off while he was asleep to keep it as a memento. After shaving the afro, Bob Ross promptly woke and obliterated the fan. Afro-less, Bob quit his show and started a new one to fit his new self. We know it as “Walker Texas Ranger”.
Despite what some people might say, the word “Ross” and “happy” are both synonyms and anagrams of each other.
The dilemma of what happens when an unstoppable force meets a unmovable force was finally answered when Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked Vin Diesel in the face. Bob Ross was born and both Vin and Norris instantly collapsed into nothingness.
Bob Ross came into existence by climbing out of a Bob Ross painting.
Bob Ross once painted a painting of the sky. it looked so good, God himself said, “You know, I’m going to use that….” the rest, is history.
In a recent study when showed a picture of a forest with a creek and mountains, and a Bob Ross Painting- 9999 out of 10,000 people preferred the painting. The final test subject died after seeing the Bob Ross painting. Autopsy evidence show that the man died of excessive joy.
**ALERT FROM THE NATIONAL INSTITUTE OF CANCER:** “We have found a cure for cancer, and it’s Bob Ross.”
SURGEON GENERAL WARNING: Watching Bob Ross may cause extreme rise in bliss, tingling sensation and butt cancer.
Bob Ross doesn’t paint with colors, he paints with existence.
Bob Ross’s Afro is enhanced by earth’s yellow sun.
Bob Ross expected the Spanish Inquisition.
Bob Ross makes such detailed trees, that they actually grow roots.
Bob Ross once painted a self-portrait that went on to paint a self-portrait.
The Joy of Painting was not filmed, each frame was painted by Bob Ross.
Bob ross’s paintings can trigger seizures.
It is a little known fact that the Second World War was only ended when Bob Ross decided to become a negotiator.
Bob Ross painted the apple tree in the Garden of Eden.
Why is the Mona Lisa smiling? …because Bob Ross gave DaVinci a painting lesson that day.
Bob Ross is responsible for velcro.
After watching an episode of “joy of painting” a fan went out to become just like bob ross, we know him as richard simons. He failed.
Bob Ross was once hit by a drunk driver, he then got up and apologized for the inconveniences.
Bob Ross once painted a picture of the sun. The painting’s now the reason for global warming.
Bob Ross’ voice is the equivalent to a night in a warm bubble bath drinking fine wine.
Bob Ross designed the garden of Edan.
If Bob Ross dropped a mentos into a bottle of diet coke, nothing would happen.
Bob Ross ignited controversy after it was discovered his paints were made from care bear afterbirth.
Whenever Bob Ross cries time stops and angels come down from heaven and sing to him.
Bob Ross farts butterflies and rainbows.
The moon did not exist until Bob Ross painted it into the sky.
Wherever Bob Ross walks the world spins itself for him so he doesn’t actually have to move.
Bob Ross’ farts are happy pine scented.
Bob Ross is painting Australian landscapes for Steve Irwin in tv heaven.
All of the world’s famous paintings were made by Bob Ross, but he didn’t consider them to be good enough, so they were thrown out, and other artists found them in the garbage.
Bob Ross was God, but he found it to be too stressful, so he painted a new omnipotent deity.
Bob Ross doesn’t have an afro. He has an aura of calmness emanating from his brain.
Chuck Norris cried for the first and last time on July Fourth, 1995.*
*The day Ross died.
Bob Ross doesn’t need to know how many roads a man must walk. He finds the stroll relaxing.
It is impossible to beat Bob Ross in a fight. (His aura of calm would make you lose your will to fight before you even made a fist.)
Bob Ross never got a bad grade on a test ever. He always convinced the teacher that the mistakes were happy accidents.
Bob Ross can paint a painting in less time then it takes for a Polaroid to develop.
Correction: Bob Ross can paint a masterpiece in the time it takes a Polaroid to be taken.
Man has never been to outer space. Any image that you see was painted by Bob Ross.
Bob Ross was far too talented and disrupted the balance of the universe. Thus, God created humans.
God consulted Bob Ross on numerous ocassions when designing the planet Earth.
Bob Ross was once stranded on a deserted island. The only replacement for a brush was his hair. He made an afro and it stayed that way ever since.
Bob Ross once painted a painting so gorgeous that it had to be kept away from human eyes. He found no place safe enough, thus, he ordered God to allow humans to only see in color.
The first bob ross video game was for the Atari 2600, with 8 mesmerizing full colors and starring happy little pixels.
Bob Ross once had an affair with the titaness Gaia. He made the trees and landscapes very happy that day. Ultimately, Gaia broke it off though. She found him to be too peaceful and nurturing.
Bob Ross has worked as a CIA assassin when not making paintings on his PBS show. He gave 23 years of service to the CIA, and a undisclosed amount of confirmed kills were made by the mild manner artist. Anything from piano wire to long range sniper shots (always one shot one kill confirmation!!). He was one of the most famous assassins for the CIA, able to get into any hot spot in the world and finish the job!
Now COMING TO THE PS3 AND PC, you will be able too do the same jobs he pulled off for the CIA in BOB ROSS ASSASSIN PAINTER: CIA STYLE. There will be a mammoth amount of weapons at your disposal ( knives, wire, electricity and water, guns and dynamite) Remove your objective with extreme Prejudice!! COMING SPRING 2009!!
Bob Ross never died. His heart was just so relaxed that it went to sleep.
Bob Ross is the reason that mankind has the will to continue its existence.
Bob Ross painted Santa’s workshop.
The Greatest American Hero was just trying to emulate Bob Ross.
A picture may say 1000 words, but Bob Ross can draw an illustration for the word ‘the’.
In ancient times, Bob Ross did a painting using the entire sky as a canvas. It was so huge, it took him 2 episodes to paint instead of just one. One day, a priest noticed that over the years the sky painting had began to fade, so he hired a bum off the street (whose name was Michelangelo) to paint the ceiling of his church so everyone could remember what the sky used to look like. That church is the Sistene Chapel.
MC Escher is Bob Ross’s dyslexic understudy .
Bob Ross has a rare version of Tourette’s that causes him to blurt out pleasant euphemisms.
There is no such thing as vision. Just Bob Ross simply painting on the inside of our eyelids.
Bob Ross briefly vacationed in Azarath, which is when he taught the young Raven Roth his secrets of calmness which is directly responsible for her amazing self-control in later years, and when she meditates she’s really just using remote viewing to view his paintings, and watch his show
Bob Ross’s smile can be utilized as a laser just by adding a few mirrors.
No two snowflakes are alike because Bob Ross likes spending time on details.
Bob Ross once painted a picture of the computer Deep Blue that was capable of beating the real thing at chess.
The city of Las Vegas came into be when Bob Ross spilled his pallet.
Bob Ross painted the internet.
Music does not soothe the savage beast Bob Ross does.
Music soothes the savage beast. Bob Ross soothes music.
Bob Ross invented happy.
In 1988 Bob Ross did a full back tattoo for a Mr. John Roberts. He was killed for his skin. Since then Bob Ross has only made one other tattoo. A butterfly on Chuck Norris’s left butt cheek.
Bob Ross’s original paint set is now enshrined in a Tibetan Buddhist temple.
Bob Ross doesn’t chew gum, just in case it was from a tree.
Bob Ross doesn’t squish bugs, he paint a light* so dazzling they refuse to bite.
Bob Ross is so in tune with his emotions, he cannot get drunk.
Bob Ross finds Barney to be too violent.
Bob Ross is America’s Number one heart donar, to this day his heart still grows back, and it is the perfect match for everyone(with a slight side effect of kindness.)
bob Ross is the man that invented the natural high.
bob Ross can paint the sound of music.
God asked Bob Ross to paint the Earth, he gave him a whole day, but he did it in a 30 minute episode.
TROLLS!!!! TIME TO DIE
tl;dr
i nearly ran Gene Wilder over one time.
but he was in my way.
he lives near my old school. whoot.
Why do these facts also apply to L Lawliet?
I luv this pictur.